Beauty, My Own Way

What comes to your mind when you think of reaching the age of 18? For many, the age of 18 has a unique meaning. Two years ago, we urged everyone above 18 years of age to “vote for equality.” ① This year, Taiwan LGBT Pride has turned 18!

Over the past 2 years, several political milestones have made impact on our everyday lives - the anti-LGBTQ referendeum in 2018, the legalization of same-sex marriage in 2019, and the Presidential Election of 2020. Despite the hurdles anti-LGBTQ forces have thrown at us, we have emerged from these challenges through collective participation.

The age of 18 symbolizes transformation and growth. From the first parade in 2003, with the goal to make LGBTQ visible, to this year’s “Beauty, My Own Way,” the LGBT pride parades in Taiwan have expanded in scale and now take place in various locations across the country every year. To this end, the LGBTIQA+ community not only needs to be visible but should also be celebrated for our beauty, vivacity, and collective transformation.

What does it mean to celebrate our beauty? A well-known Chinese idiom says it is a virtue to “help others accomplish their beauty.” While the saying originally refers to assisting others in fulfilling their wishes and virtues, we have extended its meaning to “understanding and respecting other people’s identity.” Identity is subjective. More specifically, your identity is how you choose to define yourself and how you want others to perceive you. Your identity is grounded in what you feel the most comfortable defining yourself with at this moment in your life. Your identity never stays static, so you should never feel compelled to label yourself in certain ways.

Some people might wonder why the LGBTIQA+ community encompasses so many different identities. However, this question itself raises two problems crucial to our understanding of what LGBTIQA+ means. First, this question invalidates other people's identities and, thus, shows a lack of respect. Second, this question confuses the concept of “identity” with the concept of “label.” While a label is what we assign to other people, identity is a sense of belonging we grant ourselves. When we choose to categorize ourselves, we create an identity. In contrast, when we define others using certain standards, what we do is “labeling.” In addition, identity cannot be defined by objective standards. In other words, your actions do not necessarily reveal your identity. Nobody can “help” another person decide their identity. Each and every one of us has the right to define our own identity in a way that we feel the most comfortable.

On the other hand, we often associate “turning to the age of 18” with the so-called “R-rated” subjects that are supposedly taboos for people under 18. Yet, is it only adults who have or could have sex? Sex education is not supposed to stigmatize sexual behaviors or to stop young people from engaging in any form of sexual behaviors. Instead, it is more important for young people to learn about consent, protection, and the risks and legal responsibilities associated with sex. Regarding the legal aspects, sexual protection and sexual autonomy should not be treated as mutually exclusive, which may then turn the good intention of legal protection into restrictions and barriers.

Meanwhile, must all adults have or be able to have sex? People with disabilities are often regarded as sexless. Their sexual needs may be neglected; they may not know how to deal with their sexual desires or be told that “they should not ask for so much since they are already lucky to be alive.” Compared to people with disabilities, when abled people say they do not want or need sex, they may, in turn, be questioned whether they suffer from an illness or a physical (such as sexual malfunction) or psychological problem. An established perception as such creates a misconception: people with disabilities are not supposed to engage in any sexual behaviors, while those without any sexual desires are considered to have a disability. In other words, it is deemed that those who need sex are not supposed to have it, while those who do not need sex should.

What is beauty then? If the goal of LGBTQ/gender movements is to allow for all of us to lead a way of life most comfortable to us, shouldn’t this goal also apply to how we think about our bodies? For example, some gay men have been pursuing and displaying a “strong, masculine” body image or even worshiping a “straight look” in order to dissociate from the stereotype of being effeminate. Does this anxiety about body image indicate internalized homophobia and oppression of their own community? Certainly, there is nothing wrong with one trying to fight against stereotypes. However, it becomes an oppression when we impose these expectations of body image on those who cannot meet the “ideal standards.” Moreover, transgender people and transvestites face an even more difficult situation. The stigma, discrimination, and legal limitation they face make it impossible to live as their own true selves and accomplish their beauty, and all of this is only because they don't conform to mainstream society's gender expectations. As we fight against stereotypes, we should avoid enforcing these harmful and exclusionary stereotypes ourselves. Beauty standards vary across time and space. Hence, beauty should not be one fixed imagination either.

“Helping others accomplish their beauty” can also mean “the beauty of being human.” No matter who you are and how you identify across different identity markers, such as gender, age and nationality, you are beautiful. You are a part of the LGBTIQA+ community, and that is beauty. If our society is inclusive enough, then none of us should feel sorry about living our true selves, be it at home, in schools, or in the workplace. Each of us has the right to define what is normal to us based on what is most comfortable to us.

In a person's life, the age of 18 marks a turning point. Likewise, the LGBTIQA+ movement in Taiwan has entered a new stage since the legalization of same sex marriage in 2019, an important milestone despite all the imperfections.

This year, granting civil rights to people between the age of 20 and 18 is a heavily debated topic. While turning 18 entails complete legal responsibilities under the Criminal Code, people at that age still only enjoy a limited capacity under the Civil Code. This asymmetry between rights and obligations needs to be solved by amending existing laws.

The 18th Taiwan LGBT Pride invites everyone to march on the street and to accomplish all kinds of beauty in our life. Last year, Taiwan LGBT Pride adopted the theme of “Together, Make Taiwan Better,” hoping the public would realize that LGBTIQA+ individuals are right among us. Our goal this year is for the LGBTIQA+ community to not only be seen but also truly understood and respected. Only then, would living in this world as a person be beautiful. Only then, would everyone live as their most beautiful self.

① The 2018 Taiwan LGBT Pride chose the theme “Tell Your Story, Vote for Equality” in response to the referenda taking place that year. As anti-LGBTQ groups organized 3 referenda in an attempt to oppress same-sex marriage and gender equity education, the LGBTIQA+ community urged all its members and supporters above the age of 18 to vote for the opposite.